Should we Pray for the Souls of the Departed?

In this regular feature Dave and Tom respond to questions from listeners and readers of The Berean Call.Here is this week’s question:Dear T. A. and Dave: I have a friend who is a young believer in the Lord and a close friend of his who wasn’t saved recently committed suicide.This really tore him up and he asked for me to pray for the soul of his friend, that God might give him another chance.Well, I fumbled around and then blurted out that it doesn’t work that way.What should I have said, or how should I have handled the situation.

Tom:

Dave, you know there are times in our lives where we’re shocked by something like this, a death and so on, and particularly in the case of a new believer, we’re kind of put on the spot, because we want to comfort them, at the same time, we want to give them the truth.What do you recommend here?

Dave:

Well, I don’t see that you can give any comfort.There isn’t a second chance. The Bible is very clear.“It is appointed unto to man once to die and after this the judgment,” (Hebrews:9:27And as it is appointed unto men once to die, but after this the judgment:
See All...).Now the facts are sad.We rely upon this statement:“Shall not the judge of all the earth do right?”(Genesis:18:25That be far from thee to do after this manner, to slay the righteous with the wicked: and that the righteous should be as the wicked, that be far from thee: Shall not the Judge of all the earth do right?
See All...b) We know that God is just, that God is not willing, we know that he is not willing that any should perish, but many perish because they are not willing to come God’s way.They are not willing to bow their knee.They are not willing to submit.They want to go another way and Jesus said in fact there are few that be saved when he was asked in Matthew:7:13-14 [13] Enter ye in at the strait gate: for wide is the gate, and broad is the way, that leadeth to destruction, and many there be which go in thereat: [14] Because strait is the gate, and narrow is the way, which leadeth unto life, and few there be that find it.
See All....He said, “Enter ye in at the strait gate: for wide is the gate, and broad is the way, that leadeth to destruction, and many there be which go in thereat: Because strait is the gate, and narrow is the way, which leadeth unto life, and few there be that find it.”We don’t know what God tried to do in this man’s conscience.We don’t know when he heard the gospel, when he rejected it, we do not know.All we know is that God does right and if this man had not received Christ as his Savior before he committed suicide, he put himself into eternity without Christ, and there is nothing you can do about that now.Praying for his soul—Catholics pray for that, but of course in this case, suicide-wouldn’t that be a mortal sin?He wouldn’t end up in Purgatory even for a Catholic, but he’s—

Tom:

Right, even a Catholic wouldn’t.Although, this is where it gets a little bit mushy.Let me back up to the situation that this man describes.He can’t know whether—let’s say the young friend that’s grieving, the young believer; he can’t know that his friend didn’t come to Christ.He didn’t know if there were opportunities to present the gospel, or maybe others.So my point here is—and correct me on this—if we can’t know, well there is still hope.There’s still a hope that God worked in a person’s heart.I’m thinking about the thief on the cross.This was the 11^th hour, this man on the cross, yet he heard the words.Jesus couldn’t have been more than what, 10-12 feet away, and Jesus said to him, “this day you will be with me in Paradise.”[He] heard it right from the lips of Jesus.Now certainly we know enough about that situation to see that this man confessed to Christ you know, as his Lord.But there are still areas in which we don’t know.Now is that a comfort, or at least a hope?

Dave:

I guess there’s a slight hope.We don’t know for sure, but we do know that the scripture is clear it is appointed unto man once to die and after this the judgment. So he can at least say that to his friend.I can’t pray for his soul.Praying for someone’s soul—there is no such prayer in the Bible.It is not biblical.The soul and spirit of a dead person is either in heaven, and they don’t need any prayer up there, or they are in hell and prayer won’t do them any good.You can’t get them out.On the other hand, we don’t know where he is so you can have some faint hope in that, but I’m not going to pray for his soul because it would not only be useless, but it would be an affront to God who has already told me that it’s appointed unto man once to die and after this the judgment.

Tom:

Dave, the scripture that you quoted, “Shall not the judge of all the earth do right?”There are other verses in the Bible that talk about God being absolutely fair, absolutely just, and I remember somebody saying well how do you know that?Well if the Bible is true, that God not only lays out and you see his justice throughout the Bible, but he backs it up with incredible love, because behind this incredible justice and God’s love—He sent his Son to die.Figure out whoever it might be, a loved one who passes away.Christ died for that person.So its—

Dave:

He has demonstrated his love; he has done all that he could to bring that person to himself.On the other hand, it’s a horrible thought.Someone is doomed eternally without God, without Christ, left to themselves, to their sins, to the judgment that is due that sin.God did not want that for them.Well this is horrible, but you know, why couldn’t God just change it, why couldn’t he just make this man believe?You don’t make someone believe.I believe that God has given us a will, the power of choice.That’s why you stand before witnesses and say to your bride, “I will.Yes, I will take this woman to be my wife, I will take this man to be my husband, because love requires choice.You can’t accept the gift without a choice.You can’t force a gift upon someone.That’s not a gift.So what can God do?There are certain things that can’t be undone.You know the old saying, “You can’t unscramble eggs.”There are consequences and I wish we could get that point across to my own heart, to others.There are consequences for what we do and there are eternal consequences and God is drawing us to himself.He’s given us his Word, he’s pleading with us by his Holy Spirit.He’s striving with man and if we reject that there’s nothing that can be done.